Dedicated To Anonymous at Kimba’s Blog
Are you freakishly obsessed with the daily casualty count in
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need the new Associated Press Pocket Iraq Casualty Counter! Now the information you need to make bizarre, extraneous points about the Iraqi War is at your fingertips, 24 hours a day! The Pocket Casualty Counter uses satellite technology to wirelessly provide instant updates on casualties, as they happen. And the Pocket Casualty Counter links the death toll with a historical database to provide you with the factual ammunition you need to battle those crazy neo-cons, on the go! So you'll be able to say, "I hate to be the one to tell you this, but George Bush has now murdered 10 times the number of people who are eaten alive in an average decade by the Spotted Siberian Tiger." Imagine the look of shock on their Christian fundamentalist faces!
Still not convinced? What if we told you the Pocket Casualty Counter can be personally customized, so the latest information can be delivered by your favorite anti-war celebrity? That's right! Who better to tell you that a
But wait, there's more! Act now, and we'll include a free software upgrade to get real-time WOUNDED statistics as well. And since the Pocket Casualty Counter counts SAD and SLEEPING soldiers as WOUNDED, you'll get the robust numbers you need to make killer anti-war points that will leave your opponents speechless!
How can this get any better? Order in the next 30 minutes, and we'll send you, free of charge, the AP Abacus of Dead Iraqi Civilians. Now you can count the murdered innocents of
So that's the Pocket Casualty Counter, the free WOUNDED software upgrade, and the AP Abacus of Dead Iraqi Civilians! And you can have it all for just $199.99! But you must act now! Sympathetic operators with multiple piercings are standing by! CALL NOW!